a play by Kent Diao
TIME: 5 pm Autumn, 2005
PLACE: On an island in a small garden with lots of plants, bushes and a river flowing through it
AT RISE: We see Elsmoosho, the squashed up can waking up from sleep.
ELSMOOSHO
What a nice day to take a walk in the ol’ garden.
(George the bush enters.)
GEORGE
I wonder what that piece of jacked up can is doing here stinking up my garden!
ELSMOOSHO
Hi! Do you know where I can get some water? I’m thirsty from this burning sun.
GEORGE
Look bub, you can get water anywhere but here you dirty rotten piece of messed up hobo can!
ELSMOOSHO
Well fine! I don’t want your filthy water!
GEORGE
Then go!
ELSMOOSHO
I can’t believe that dude is so mean.
SCENE TWO
TIME: 10:00 pm
PLACE: The garden
AT RISE: We see Elsmoosho sneaking in the garden
ELSMOOSHO
If I can’t have some water, I’ll steal it
(George wakes up.)
! Uh oh!
GEORGE
Alright who’s there!?!
ELSMOOSHO
I better get out of here!
GEORGE
Well you better!
SCENE THREE
TIME: 7:00 am
PLACE: The garden
AT RISE: We see George guarding the river
GEORGE
That can better not come!
ELSMOOSHO
LOOK WHY DON’T YOU LET ME DRINK?
GEORGE
Because you’re too dirty!!!
ELSMOOSHO
Well, you can’t blame me! I’ve become dirty over time. I used to be a clean Coke can all shiny and colorful. But then I got scrunched up and left here on the ground. I’ve been sitting here for three years getting kicked around becoming litter.
GEORGE
How about I clean you up and you help me.
ELSMOOSHO
What do I help you with?
GEORGE
Help make my garden better.
ELSMOOSHO
Then you’re getting the better part of the deal!
GEORGE
Fine then, don’t take my deal!
ELSMOOSHO
OK then you bush!
GEORGE
At least I’m not a can! Ha!
ELSMOOSHO
Good day! No wait, bad day!
SCENE FOUR
TIME: 6:00 pm
PLACE: The garden
AT RISE: We see Elsmoosho dressed up as Mr. T
ELSMOOSHO (A.K.A. Mr.T)
I pity da foo who don’t share his water!
GEORGE
Nice try bum!
ELSMOOSHO
Rrrr! I am going to punch you!
(The blow lands. George becomes unconscious.)
That oughta teach him! What is that noise?
(Nuclear bomb falls. They both go to heaven.)
SCENE FIVE
TIME: 10:00 pm
PLACE: Heaven
AT RISE: They are on a cloud arguing
GEORGE
I know you blew up the city just to get away from me! Well, guess what, I made it to heaven!
ELSMOOSHO
I wonder if I could blow up heaven?
GEORGE
You better not!
ELSMOOSHO
Watch me!
(Elsmoosho takes a bomb and blows up heaven.)
SCENE SIX
TIME: 12:00 pm
PLACE: Heaven #2
AT RISE: They are arguing on a cloud
ELSMOOSHO
Look! If you just give me some water…
GEORGE
Oh no here we go with giving free stuff to bums!
ELSMOOSHO
Alright that’s it! You and me in the circle of death.
GEORGE
Come on you know we can’t! You are a can and I’m a bush!
ELSMOOSHO
Fine how about you give me water and we be friends?
GEORGE
Do you really honestly believe that I would fall for that? Now, if you’ll excuse me, I’ll be going to the buffet.
(George leaves.)
ELSMOOSHO
I can’t believe that fool! He doesn’t know what I am. If he would just give me some water, I could grant him a wish. But he doesn’t know that I am magic. I want him to give me water not just to get a wish, but to give it to me because he feels I’m his friend.
(George comes back wiping his mouth.)
GEORGE
Are you still trying to get water?
ELSMOOSHO
Alright how about this, you give me some water and I’ll give you anything you want?
GEORGE
OK, but how can I trust you?
ELSMOOSHO
Let me tell you something. I’ve wanted water for a long time and I will give anything for it. Plus, I’m afraid you will squash me more if I don’t give you your wish.
GEORGE
Well, you do have a point there…So I’ll think about it.
ELSMOOSHO
Well, please hurry, I’m almost dead!
GEORGE
Fine I’ll give you some water.
ELSMOOSHO
Oh please hurry!
GEORGE
But I can’t give unless you give me my wish!
ELSMOOSHO
I can’t until you give me water!
GEORGE
Fine, I’ll give you water!
(George gives water. Elsmoosho drinks water.)
ELSMOOSHO
Alright now I give you your wish!
(Elsmoosho glows green and a garden appears.)
GEORGE
Wow! Thanks a lot!
ELSMOOSHO
You’re welcome. So what do we do now?
GEORGE
Wanna live here with me in the garden?
ELSMOOSHO
Alright! Together we can create a great environment and we can have a separate city!
GEORGE
It’s nice doin’ business with you.
(They shake hands.)
THE END
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